To Live Without
by GoddessLD
Summary: OneShot. Anna's POV. Yoh, can you live without me? ...Rather... Can I live without you? YohxAnna


I do not own Shaman King.  
  
Warning: Anna is a little OOC here. Please forgive me.  
  
**-To Live Without-**  
  
Am I capable of living without Yoh?  
  
_Yes, of course.  
_  
Here I sit on the floor of my room, staring at a mirror. I ask myself this question. I can live without Yoh, right? For hours, I sat here, asking, both aloud and in my head. Soon, I'll be reciting 'Mirror mirror on the wall, can I live without Yoh at all?'  
  
It's actually a simple question however, I cannot answer it. For when I think about living with Yoh, I see that I can live without him. But when I think about living without him, I feel cold. If I imagine myself living without him, I can see myself drowning in a lake of ice cold water. I could see myself reaching out to grab something only to find that my efforts are futile.  
  
I don't want to get out of my room. I fear that if I see Yoh, I might think I can't live without him.  
  
_Can I live without seeing his foolish smile everyday?  
_  
Yes.  
  
_Can I live without the support he unwittingly gives me in all that I do?  
_  
.....Yes... I don't need anyone's support.  
  
_Can I live without the warmth he provides me in my heart?  
_  
...  
  
_Can I live without clinging to his outstretched hand, keeping me from drowning in that ice cold water?  
  
_ ...  
  
_Can I live without him? Can I live without Yoh?  
  
_ Suddenly, I'm not sure anymore. I answered this question with 'Yes, of course' before, but can I really live without him?  
  
Then, HIS voice shakes me out of my thoughts. YOH'S voice.  
  
"Anna? Can I come in?" he asks. Should I let him in?  
  
After a moment, I answered, "...Yes."  
  
I kept my head straight forward, looking at the mirror, as I heard the door slide open and soft footsteps getting closer to me.  
  
"Anna...Dinner is ready," he said. He then waited as if waiting for me to say something. However, I kept my mouth closed. I heard an almost inaudible sigh as he turned to leave the room.  
  
"Yoh," I said. He stopped walking to the door and turned to see me stare at him with a piercing look. "...Can you... Can you live without me?"  
  
He looked somewhat surprised when I asked him the question which changed to a thoughtful expression, as if he was weighing the choices. I got a little discouraged. Of course he can live without me. What do I do for him? Nothing. Absolutely nothing.  
  
I turned my head towards the mirror and lowered it as I came to that realization. I just waiting for his answer which would definitely be, _"Yes Anna, I can live without you."_ However, his actual answer was different.  
  
"Nope. I don't think I can live without you," he said, smiling his usual, lazy smile.  
  
I was shocked at first. Then, I remembered.  
  
_Of course he would say that. He's afraid of me.  
_  
I narrowed my eyes at the thought.  
  
"Yoh, tell me the truth. I'm not going to do anything to you even if you tell me that you can live without me. Can you live without me?" I asked again. He looked confused as he stared at my tightly clutched hands and my lowered face.  
  
"I am telling the truth. I can't live without you," he repeated.  
  
"Why not? I do nothing for you. Rather, you do everything for me," I said, trying to keep the anger and self-disappointment from showing.  
  
"Actually, you do a lot for me." I turned to look at him. He face was a little red and he was scratching his head, but he was still smiling.  
  
"Oh? Like what?" He coughed when I asked this question.  
  
"Umm... You... Uhh...." He was stuttering. He couldn't say what I do for him.  
  
"Thought so. I told you not to lie to me," I said, coldly.  
  
"I-I wasn't lying! Really, you do a lot for me! Like... Like... You give me confidence whenever I fight! And you also give me a reason to exist. You give me a purpose to fulfill in my life.... Umm... And...Y-You... make me the happiest guy living in this world... well... at least from my prospective you do," he said, blushing madly.  
  
I looked at him, truly surprised. Did I really mean that much to him? I tried to hide my slightly red cheeks by lowering my hair. After a moment of silence, he came near me and offered me a hand.  
  
"Come on, dinner is going to get cold," he said with a gentle smile. I stared at the hand. He was offering to take me out of that lake. I relaxed and lightly smiled as I grabbed his hand and allowed him to lead me. His warm hand... Suddenly, I felt all the coldness leave me. I felt warm. Warm around him.  
  
So, can I live without Yoh?  
  
_Definitely not.  
_  
**-The End-  
**  
------  
  
I was hit with this weird inspiration thingy when I was listening to some song by Avril Lavigne. Eheheheheheheheh. I hope you enjoyed it. Sorry it's another MAJORLY SHORT ONE SHOT!  
  
GoddessLD


End file.
